This week’s soundtrack encompasses so many things for me. While many of them aren’t something I can go into in this post, I can share that I have been going through some stuff. Nothing major, nothing I can’t handle, but stuff just the same. It seems that the universe isn’t done shaking things up for your’s truly, but I am nothing if not resiliant.
This song, as well as the movie it featured in, came out a few years after my Cancer diagnosis. What I remember it doing very succinctly at the time, was to give me a message to repeat to myself, in a way no other thing could. To this day, when things get heavy, I pull out the chorus like an old blanket, and cover myself in it. Something I have been doing ALOT lately.
Let it go, let it go
Can’t hold it back anymore
Let it go, let it go
Turn away and slam the door
I don’t care what they’re going to say
Let the storm rage on
The cold never bothered me anyway“Let It Go” – from Disney’s Frozen
Now more than ever, it is the last verse of the song (1:30), more than the chorus, that resonates with my tired bones. It connects me to my younger self, the person who had way more energy than I do now, who felt she could do anything if given the chance. I’ve really missed her this last year, 2020 has finally taken its toll on me. But I am happy to report that the 90’s version of myself isn’t done with me yet, since this song popped into my head at precisely 4:45 AM today with its beautiful message – to let it go.
For those of you not familiar with the movie Frozen, it is the story of two sisters. One who is in self-imposed exile because of the harm she can do with a magic she is trying to hide, and the other, who doesn’t understand why their relationship has changed. The movie itself has all of the charm, humor, and heart-warming moments I’ve come to expect from these types of films, and connected with me at the time because of what I had going on in my life. I am really glad it is still here with me since now more than ever I need to hear it’s message. I highly recommend watching it if you haven’t seen it, it is one of my favorite movies by Disney, with it’s roots in “The Snow Queen” by Hans Christian Andersen. The movie with Danny Kaye bearing the author’s name, which weaves fairy tales into the story of the author’s life, is also one of my all-time favorites. Looks like I have some digging to do, I haven’t watched that in years and now I want to!
It is never easy to let the past go, and working through that is something I still struggle with on almost a daily basis. There are too many reminders in this world that pull me back to hard times, and the laundry list of new challenges that life has dropped in my lap has been a tad overwhelming. But I am determined to squelch the negativity, something I have consciously done since a dear friend pointed out that I could use an attitude adjustment so many years ago. At the time I didn’t realize that that the words I spoke gave such a negative impression. Now, more than ever, I understand the power of words, and I make an effort not to put any out that will bring me, or any one else, down. The stories I write do the same, and strive to give characters a way out of whatever they have gotten themselves into. Sort of like shining a light in a dark forest, so to speak. It’s time to give myself that same light.
What I suppose I am trying to say, in a very cryptic and strange way, is that changes are coming for me. I can’t prevent them from happening, and much as I want to hang onto to all of the pieces of the past version of myself, it isn’t healthy for me to do so. I am taking what I need to move forward with, and throwing the rest away. And the things in my life that once served me, but no longer do, well… I’m going to let those go. Some folks may not be ready for it, but I sure am.
As always, thank you for sharing this journey with me, and for taking the time out of your day to read my thoughts. It means alot. For anyone interested in what I write, please feel free to stay a while and poke around on my website. I have a ton of content I’ve been developing over the years and I would love to get your thoughts on it.
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For more Soundtrack of my Life posts:
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As always, I hope this post finds you happy and healthy. Until next time! XO